Housemate and I started a Money Club a few months ago.
The first rule of Money Club is that you don't need to be "ready" for Money Club. The second rule of Money Club is that it meets on the first of the month, or as near thereafter as schedules permit. (We met last night.) The third rule of Money Club is that nothing that we learn about one another's finances, or the ways we manage or fail to manage our money, will diminish our friendship, love, and respect for one another.
The agenda of Money Club has varied but is evolving into a rough pattern. The first Money Club was a long car trip and we talked about fear and shame around money, about goals and confusion and responsibility and the ideas we have about being a Grownup and a Good Person and how we imagine those things are related to money. We told each other our complete financial situations, as best we could. We talked about our goals and our mental blocks.
Now monthly meetings consist of: 1) a reconciliation of house expenses -- groceries, bills, etc. -- and an allocation of upcoming bills and/or delivery of a check for the difference from the person who paid less than her share; 2) a report of the previous month's financial situation, and our progress on our goals. Remembering the Third Rule of Money Club, this as often as not involves a report like mine last night: for the second month in a row I failed to track my dining out expenses, and I'm abandoning that goal in favor of simply restricting the number of times per week I can buy lunch instead of bringing it, and buy dinner instead of making it myself. 3) We set goals for the upcoming month and/or longer (mine: restrict eating out costs, survive Christmas intact, clear the way for a Jan 1, 2004 installation of Quicken), and 4) we adjourn. It's funny but every month we have to remind one another of all three of the rules of Money Club, still, or we'd put off these meetings and never do this stuff.
I made a spreadsheet that just has a snapshot of my finances on the first of each month in the following categories: Checking, Savings, 401(k), IRA, Equity in house, Mortgage, Home Equity Line, Student Loan, Credit Card. Each month I fill in the numbers as they are on the morning of the 1st. Now that it's been going for a while I am starting to have a sense of progress, ever so slight, as my assets increase, just a little, in value each month and my liabilities get ever so slightly smaller. It is so hard to be patient.
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