And Now, A Vain And Shallow Request

On May 8th the Hooked On Tonics girls are throwing a party (also I am walking a half-marathon on that day. And also, seeing a long-lost old flame). On May 22nd I am going to a wedding. On July 4th, I am going to another wedding that, although ostensibly the wedding of my best friend Autumn to my dear college friend Tony, I like to think of as my wedding. I introduced them, after all, so I feel the day is really best considered a celebration of me. It's a big day.

At all of these events I would like to look properly cute. Specifically, buff and toned and ready to wear little strappy dresses. Assume I am not yet there. Please send me your best strategies for getting strong and lean and toned in 10 days, 24 days, and 66 days. The countdown is on.

(Strategies that do not involve totally gnarly radical dietary and willpower transformations will be given special attention. But I am willing to stop eating M & Ms from my co-worker's candy dish, and to sweat a little bit.)

Comments

[Sherry]

I can't believe that with all the walking you do (you have been doing it, right?) you're not buff, toned and ready to wear strappy little numbers already!

[Dave]

To lose weight: The South Beach Diet. And it helps your cardiovascular health.

To get buff: hit those weights. May I suggest pumping iron 3x a week, and doing core exercises as many times as you can stand it. Start off doing 1 set each of the following exercises. Do 15 repetitions of each exercise, using enough weight that the last repetition is somewhat difficult. Use free weights whenever possible (they use more muscles than machines do). And keep a journal of your workouts, noting how many reps you did, how much weight you used, etc. If it becomes easy to do 15 reps of a certain exercise, bump the weight up 5 or 10 pounds.

Squat
Leg curl
Bench press
Bent-over rows (using a barbell) or seated rows (using a machine)
Upright rows
Dips (either using a dip station or using a machine)
Military press
Lat pull-down

For core exercises, do 15-20 reps each of the following exercises:

Crunches (concentrate on tightening your ab muscles to raise your shoulder blades off the floor)
Leg raises (lie on your back with your legs bent at a 90-degree angle. Keeping the angle in your legs, lift your knees toward your chest. Then slowly lower)
Superwoman (lie on your stomach with your arms and legs sticking out. Simultaneously lift your arms and legs 4-6 inches in the air, contracting your lower back).

If this all sounds like too much damn work, then just keep up the walking and do as many push-ups, pull-ups and crunches as you can stand.

Hope this helps.

[Neal]

Good advice from Dave, I would only add to decrease your calorie intake as much as you can stand and increase the intensity of your cardiovascular workouts as much as possible.

Good luck!

[Haystack]

Hop on a bike, Sherry - a real one. Back when I was on the rowing team, I think I got in better shape biking forty minutes each way to practice than I did actually rowing.

Just get out there on the bike three days a week for half an hour at a time, and challenge yourself. You will see non-trivial improvements in a month or so.

[Amy]

South Beach Diet. (I'm doing it online at southbeachdiet.com) I've lost 5 lbs in 6 days, though I certainly don't expect to continue at that rate. I think some of it is "water weight", as metabolism adjusts. First two weeks are more strict, then you add back carbs. I'm DYING for a beer, but I've enjoyed lots of seafood. I feel energetic. Been walking a lot too. Good luck!

[mad]

I don't believe in low carb diets, since I think they're unhealthy and unrealistic, though they seem to be a good way to lose weight quickly. I recommend a combination of cardio and strength training. I'm gathering that running isn't your thing, but perhaps you can take the get-on-a-bike recommendation (or take a spin class at your gym once or twice a week) and maybe add a little swimming, plus some weights (the recommendation above is fine, although my trainer recommends limiting weight sets to 12 reps each. For a combo of metabolism increase and toning I recommend super-sets at moderate weight(e.g., moving with virtually no rest between sets of two exercises, such as doing 12 tricep pull-downs followed by 12 bicep curls and then repeating that duo for a total of three sets of each. Then do fifteen crunches with your back on a fit-ball, and move into the next super-set combo, such as leg presses mixed with hamstring curls).

Oh -- and the climbing gym is a GREAT way to get where you want to go on the buff/toned front. Climbing builds beautiful long, lean muscles. If you want to push it, try doing a bunch of easy routes in quick succession to get your heart rate up.

[Dave]

I mostly agree with MAD, except that:

(a) South Beach isn't a low carb diet--it only limits carbs for the first 2 weeks, and then you bring them back. It's also not unhealthy, in that you aren't rationed a pound of bacon to eat in the morning. It's mostly lean meats, lots of veggies, etc.

(b) 3 sets of an exercise is an awful lot, especially if you're just getting back to the gym. I'd start doing 1 set with higher reps, then as you progress you can do 2 sets and lower the reps a bit.

And climbing is excellent exercise.

[Autumn]

Oh my God, 66 days! How did this happen?

This is my plan, based on nothing at all scientific. It's just what's worked for me in the past when I wanted to get in tip-top shape.

I am going to alternate between walking, running, and swimming, making sure I exercise at least 5 times a week. I am going to drink lots and lots of water. (I think I'll buy a water bottle with a straw because it's easier to constantly be drinking out of those than out of a bottle I have to tip into my mouth.) I am going to stop eating all empty carbs- no bagels, crackers, pretzels, etc. I am not going to eat anything I know makes me break out (pizza, nachos, popcorn, chips, french fries, chocoloate). I'll snack on baby carrots, apples, raisins, and dried apricots. And, I'll stop eating fistfuls of candy. Oh, I guess I should stop eating all candy. 66 days.

Regardless of how we look, it's going to be a glorious day and we are going to glow!

SOUTH BEACH DIET@! I am a huge critic of diet fads, but this REALLy REALLY REALLY works, I lost 8 lbs. in 2wks, and now am down 13 lbs. in 1 month (and no running or going to gym, just slight dietary chagnes!) ... try it, do a google search and you will find all you need to follow the diet for free (no $$). I bought the book, and it was worth it. But all the info is also on the net, it just takes a while to compile it.

GOOD LUCK!!

[Rayne of Terror]

Weight Watchers online is a fantastic way to lose weight. I have lost 45 pounds. My suggestions for best overall toning are real biking, with hills; the elliptical machine, and free weights. Sometimes I do 5 lb free weights [arms] on the elliptical to really get my heart rate up. Add some pilates abs moves and you will make a big difference in how your clothes fit and how you look in a short time.

[monica]

in addition to what all these people have said, lots of common beverages are a huge source of calories, sugar (carbs) and general unhealthy-ness. your body will love you if you cut out beer, soda, and drink lots and lots of water. (studies show that if there's a water bottle sitting on your desk throughout the day, you're much more likely to drink it.)

[pjm]

I think the South Beach Diet is one of the scarier things my former company has perpetrated on this world. Of the people I've known who tried it, either it was too hard for them to stick to, or they were neurotic and didn't need a diet anyway. One of my sort-of-ex-colleagues insists that it will take ten years off your life... in a bad way. That said, we're all an experiment of one.

I like the weights suggestion. Lean muscle takes more energy to maintain than fat, so in addition to visible results it compounds the benefit of reasonable, attainable reductions in diet and regular exercise. That's a good short-term addition to what you're already doing, and the results will pay off long-term as well.

(Free weights will help more than machines, but if the weight room is scary and/or full of scary people, it's not worth it.)

[Scheherazade]

Wowsers. Okay. I'm already walking 15 - 30 miles per week, and I've been going to the gym to run or do the elliptical trainer on many of the days I don't walk. I'm going to mix up the elliptical trainer with running outside, bicycling around town, which I don't do often enough but really like (I have an old Wicked Witch of the West three speed bike I got at a garage sale that is my pride and joy), and with more rock climbing. And yoga, which I miss. Have been lifting only sporadically and am going to make that a priority -- especially my arms and shoulders, which can get a lot more toned and buff than they are. I'm going to try to exercise for 7 - 10 hours a week until the wedding. I'm pretty close to that now, actually, but I'll be pushing to make it more intense, and make the weightlifting portion more consistent and structured. Maybe 10-12 hours is a better goal.

As for food, I'm already a reasonably healthy eater but I'm going to stop the M&Ms and pastries that are always around the office, and cut back on carbs generally, without being nuts about it. I'm not much of a dieter by nature. No alcohol until the party on May 8. Lots of water. No sugar. I'll let you know how it goes.