I have no idea what I can bench, without looking at the sheet in my gym bag where I write down settings and reps and little comments (like "hard!" or "did not finish 3rd set"). I do know that I came in with my old sheet, with what I used to lift, and thought I should just start there. Bad idea. I was nowhere near strong enough in most places. Legs and glutes are still strong. Shoulders, back, biceps, and chest are weak, weak weak. Calves are weak weak compared to the old days.
I also know that it feels great to be sore from lifting. It's a different and more satisfying kind of tired. I can't wait until I start feeling strong again, and can start increasing the weight. And it feels great to be running. Housemate and I ran 3.5 miles today, with no noticeable discomfort. We were talking about a range of topics -- mostly trauma and ethics and whether a survivor/victim of a trauma can ever have a rational point of view about it, or whether she's forever fated to be discounted by others as being biased or overly emotional. Anyway, the point is that neither of us had trouble conversing normally, and neither of us suggested slowing down or walking at all, and neither of us remarked about the fact that we were running or made encouraging comments to the other one ("gee, you're looking strong and energetic. You're my inspiration."). We just ran, and it felt good and normal. Progress.
By the way, I love your writing.
Posted by: david | December 02, 2005 at 01:19 AM