Enough About Me

I've been reading with delight and curiousity about you, hidden there on the other side of the computer screen.  I've known since last December that you're a good-looking and creative bunch.  I had no idea that so many law-types were sticking around here.  Even more interesting are the non-lawyers who've found their way here.  It's nice to have you all joining me.  You guys seem smart, reflective, curious, accomplished, and articulate.  [And if you haven't checked in, please consider doing so now.]

My sequence of responses to "seeing" the audience here at Stay of Execution has been a sort of rotation of emotions.  Gratification and pride (all these people think I'm interesting, and nice, and a good writer.  Isn't that cool!)  giving way to self-consciousness, fear and nervousness (what if I let all these people down?!).  There's a new little voice speaking on my shoulder when I sit down to write, trying to decide if something I want to say will appeal to "this audience."  That's you.  Knowing how many of you are immersed in the world of the law makes me think I should make law references more often.  Those of you who said you read this as though it's a novel make me feel a little bit guilty -- I don't know how it's going to turn out, either, and I can't be sure it will feel interesting or satisfying or sufficiently dramatic.  I'm glad for the people who say they like the mix of topics and the sense of geography or place.  Sometimes when I write little glimpses of things I saw or what the water smelled like or something, I don't get any comments and I wonder whether those things bore people to death (as opposed to a post about how I need to repair my toilet, which will get lots of comments).  I write them because I want to remember the way something looked or smelled or felt but it's nice to know some of you read them and like them.  I try really hard not to worry about what my readers will or won't like when I write what's in my head.  But it's impossible not to think about it, at least for a moment.  And it just got a little bit harder when I became more aware of you. 

To all of you who said I write well -- thank you so very much.  I really need to hear that sometimes, so your small compliment will become part of the special folder I have that I look at when I feel confused and dejected and listless and lost.  The idea that I can move people with my words is really what I most want in the world.  By telling me I've moved you, you've made me know that aspiration is possible, and that it's not stupid.  I can't tell you what a gift that is.  Believe me, it means a lot. 

I think if I wanted to become a "big famous blogger" I would change a lot of things about this weblog.  But that's not my purpose here.  I'm looking for a way to reflect on and to share my life.  Those of you who said that it would be fun to have a glass of wine together, I think so too.  I suspect if/when we get a chance to do that you won't be too surprised at me and how I am in person.  I'm trying to be authentic here, and not contrived.  Hugh McLeod says "a blog gets the audience it deserves."  If he's right, and this blog deserves you guys, that feels like quite a compliment. 

Comments

I certainly cant speak for everyone, but its actually refreshing to have a mix of things other than law. I suspect the reason you have so many of us law types is that google searches led us into your page. Reading your everyday exploits (regardless of content) and the raw honesty behind them is what keeps me coming back. I can relate to so much of what you write and that is what I love. Keep doing what you're doing. Please.

[ms]

I agree with the previous poster. I am a "law type" but that is definitely not why I enjoy reading your blog. I wouldn't want you to try to write more about law stuff--as you yourself embody, we law types are interested in all kinds of different things. And for me, that variety of topics is a real strength of your blog.

As is your writing itself. I have been moved to tears on a number of occasions by something you've written, and not just the "obvious" ones. And I'm often moved to smile, or sigh wistfully, or or laugh, or pause and imagine. I always have a reaction to what you've written, but I don't post a comment every time--for me, the point is that you've communicated something to me, as your reader, and it's not about me publicizing my reaction to that. Please trust that we are enjoying and reacting and thinking and contemplating, even if we aren't always commenting! I think this blog is quite an accomplishment, and I'm glad you put the time and energy and creativity into it so that you can share it with us. :-)

[MT]

"You're such a lovely audience, we'd love to take you home with us, we'd love to take you home!"

[just a guy]

Please don't let your perception of who your audience is, or what we're looking for, color your writing or choice of subjects. I read your blog precisely because you seem not to pander to us.

[Dan]

We read your blog because of the mix of topics you cover. The writing is for the most part excellent. Not all of us are "Law" types though...

[T.]

It is the consistency and substance of your writing and reflection that keeps me coming back, to name a few. The honesty and self-depreciation, the marvels of everyday observations that mirror what seem to be only in our younger selves (and somehow, we forgot to bring along into our adulthood). The ease with which each sentence flows, re-reading it over again, because it is lucid and flows smoothly out of your month. The self-questioning is witty, funny and welcoming, a reminder, that you too, above being a great writer, are also human. A wonderful person filled with intellectual prowess. Thanks also, for sharing your world and thoughts with us.

[bill]

When in doubt,
Leave law out.
(with apologies to the late Johnnie Cochran)

[BF]

Keep the personal reflections about things you see or smell or hear - those are priceless. This blog is refreshing in that you talk about a variety of things, and those of us involved in the law are probably reading your thoughts as a nice escape. Keep doing what you are doing, and we'll keep reading.